Preparations

The last month there has been pretty much one thing going round and round in my head... chinachinachinachinachina. Every time I tell someone what I'm going to be doing, without exception I always get one of the following three responses which I respond to in the following way (either out loud or in my head while I smile politely)...

1. "You must be crazy" - yes, yes I must. But what I think is crazier is giving up an opportunity like this to waste my youth doing the exact same things day-in, day-out, that I will still be doing in my 30's, 40's and beyond. There's all the time in the world to get a job, have children, settle down with someone. Why would I want to do that now? That's what I think is crazy.

2. "You must be SO excited" - OK, I'll admit the thing that people off on the adventure of their lifetimes should never, ever admit, especially when they've just paid a lot of money to be doing it. Right now, I'm not excited at all. I'm petrified, stressed, and most of all sad about what I'm leaving behind. Don't get me wrong, I don't regret my decision for a minute. But, excited isn't at the top of my list of emotions at this particular moment when all I can think about is the fact this time in two weeks I'll be on the other side of the world with no-one who knows anything about me.

3. "You're so brave" - I only have one thing to say to that.... fake it til you make it. I've never felt less brave in my life, but I'm not going to let that stop me!


I have just over a week left until I leave, which I will be spending with my lovely boyfriend who is the most ridiculously supportive person I have ever met in my life. I couldn't have done any of this or had the balls to do this without him! I'm not sure how he has the patience to put up with me and my crazy ideas, but I'm so grateful he does and I can't wait to come out the other side knowing he's going to be waiting for me.  Pessimists say what you will (and a lot of them already have in very blunt words to me), but I believe if you want to make something work then you can. And I guess this will really test the true meaning of 'long distance relationship'... Thank god for Skype!

But for now, time for me to carry on with packing and realizing how much useless crap I own.